Sunday, August 25, 2013

Jamie Jong: Outlaw Landlord

Jamie Jong: Outlaw Landlord
This is not about my present landlord.

Voice: He grew up on the meanest streets of Hong Kong in the 1980's, where he learned to fend for himself...

(A shack is surrounded by a gang of hoodlums.)

Hoodlum #1: (leering) Looks like we found ourselves a new hideout. (They are hit by a burst of fire from a nail gun. The young Jong appears to them through a hole.)

Jong: Get the fuck off my property! (They flee in panic.)

(A present day room in a Vancouver rooming house.)

Tenant: Jamie, it gets brutally hot in here. Do you think you could fix my window?

Jong: You want air? I'll give you air! (He takes a hammer and bashes a hole in the wall.)

(A kitchen in the same rooming house.)

Tenant #1: I can't believe Jamie bought us a hotplate.

Tenant #2: Yeah, and a two-burner one, no less!

(Exit tenants. Enter Jong disguised as a burglar. He looks behind him and takes possession of the hotplate. Re-enter Tenant #1 from Jong's rear.)

Tenant #1: Where are you going with our hotplate, Jamie?

Jong: Uh- I'm trading it for a one-burner.

Voice: Don't miss Jamie Jong: Outlaw Landlord tonight, only on this channel.
  
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© 2007, 2013. Scripts by David Skerkowski. All rights reserved.

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